Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel
ashamed.Then I look into the glass and think about the
workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If
I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their
dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is
better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true,
than be selfish and worry about my liver."
--by Jack Handy
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
--Henny Youngman
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in
the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
--Frank Sinatra
An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend
time with fools.
--Ernest Hemingway
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?
--Stephen Wright
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall
asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit
no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go
to heaven!
-- Brian O'Rourke
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
--Benjamin Franklin