Mrs. Jones, I'm sorry to inform you, but we've run the tests, and it appears that you have XP. Now don't cry - it's bad, but it's not a death sentence. Modern science has advanced in recent years, and it's now possible to live a reasonably happy life with XP. And there's a survivor's group that you'll want to meet as well.
See the full article from theregister.co.uk here.