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Peter Sheil

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September 9th, 2002

Bizarre Medical Record Statements [Sep. 9th, 2002|07:55 am]
Peter Sheil
The folowing were found in patient records .. you have to worry who was more ill the patients or the doctors writing this stuff :)

"The skin was moist and dry."

"The patient lives at home with his mother, father, and pet
turtle, who is presently enrolled in day care three times a

"The patient was in his usual state of good health until his
airplane ran out of gas and crashed."

"The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took
a job as stockbroker instead."

"While in the emergency room, she was examined, X-rated and
sent home."

"When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room."

"She is numb from her toes down."

"The baby was delivered, the cord clamped and cut, and handed
to the pediatrician, who breathed and cried immediately."
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Quotes of the day [Sep. 9th, 2002|08:02 am]
Peter Sheil
A lie told often enough becomes the truth.
Lenin (1870 - 1924)
Do you think President Bush has heard that one?

I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
Mae West (1892 - 1980)
:) I couldn't resist this quote.

I do not have a psychiatrist and I do not want one, for the simple reason that if he listened to me long enough, he might become disturbed.
James Thurber (1894 - 1961), "Carpe Noctem, If You Can", in "Credos and Curios" (1962)

A poem is never finished, only abandoned.
Paul Valery (1871 - 1945)
A love, once given, remains forever.
Though it may seem abandoned there is a glimmer that lives on
despite everything - that hope, that spark of humanty, drives us on
to ... to where? ... who knows. Time alone can tell.

looks like the quotes and the emotional bits got mixed up today.
*big sigh*
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Redhead joke [Sep. 9th, 2002|08:39 am]
Peter Sheil
... guess who this is aimed at...

A redhead goes to the Doctor and says that she hurts all over.

"All over?" asks the Doctor.

"Yes" she says. "Look if I poke my head ... ouch, my arm ... ouch, my chest ... ouch, my legs ... ouch. Everywhere I touch it is painful and it really really hurts doc, you've got to do something for me."

"Ahh" says the doctor, "I think I see the problem. Were you a blonde before you became a redhead?"

"Why yes doctor, I only dyed my hair three days ago. So what is my problem? Is it serious?"
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